If you’re going through a divorce or already talked to your significant other about going your own ways, there’s a lot to process. No matter the circumstances, the divorce process can take a heavy emotional toll, and it’s not always easy to think straight faced with such a major life decision.
During a divorce, what you don’t do counts almost as much as what you do. One divorce mistake could cost you a lot, and if you want to protect your interests in court you have to pay attention not to let anything slip.
In this article, we’ll give you the 6 most common mistakes people make during their divorce and give you a few tips on how to avoid them.
Going Out Fighting
When anyone mentions a divorce, the first thing that pops to your mind is two former partners fighting to their proverbial death with lawyers adding more fuel to the fire. Indeed, divorces are always portrayed like this in the media. But it doesn’t have to be like that.
With the help of a divorce mediator like Pacific Coast Mediation, former spouses can reach a mutually beneficial agreement in terms of finances, child custody, and other delicate questions. So before you go out for blood, consider there is a peaceful yet effective alternative that could benefit everyone, especially your children.
Not Keeping Tabs on Old Debts
The worst thing that can happen after a divorce is finding out that there is a credit card bill you and your former partner made that never got paid off. Therefore, it’s a good idea to get your credit report before the divorce is underway, so you can settle any collective debts during the process.
Giving Your Spouse Access to Personal Email and Social Networks
Many people forget the fact that our former spouses have access or know the password to all our social media accounts, emails and other online means of communications.
And while they can and should read the emails directed to both of you, you can’t have them going through your personal messages. They may stumble upon a conversation with your lawyer or a different conversation that may give them an advantage in the court.
Therefore, make sure to change all your passwords to avoid this dangerous mistake.
Not Settling On a Parenting Time Schedule
Making some scheduling mistakes or not addressing who gets custody during important holidays is a common problem with many spouses during a divorce. This is why you should consult a calendar and make a schedule as you go through it.
Forgetting About Personal Items
During the intensive divorce process, some of the most valuable personal items like jewelry, photos, family heirlooms and other invaluable items may disappear. And getting these items after a divorce can be tricky. One way is to confront your former partner, and the other one is to sneak in when they are not there. Both are equally bad.
The answer: pack all your valuables and dear personal items in one container before the divorce process starts and get them out of the house. Make sure to get in touch with your ex to retrieve your personal belongings as soon as possible, because if you wait too long they may not be there anymore.
Involving Your Children in the Battle
It’s in everyone’s best interest to keep your children out of the divorce process as much as you can. Giving them too many details can scar them for life. Trying to have them take your side is even worse and can damage them beyond repair. Furthermore, the court may interpret this as trying to create parental alienation. This could lead to your spouse getting more custody.